Living together advice for other volunteers
Hello. I am Azer Hegshunas. I am from Azerbaijan. I have been volunteering in Baia Mare in Yellow Shirts Organization since 10th September 2019. This article is about living with other volunteers from different nationalities with different characters.
To begin with, Romania is the first European country in my life that I came to, got the temporary resident permit and spent more than 8 months. Regarding being the only child in a family, sometimes I was thinking about whether I could live with other people in the same flat for more than 8 months. Imagine, for 27 years you do not share your room or kitchen and after some days you are going to share a flat. Unlike other citizens, in Romania I did not see any Azerbaijani volunteer. It also was a challenge for me.
When it comes to living in the same flat, when I arrived in Baia Mare inside the house were more than 8 people. Friends of my flatmates had come. Regarding having Turkish volunteers also made my adaption to the flat a little bit easy. However, real challenges were ahead. When most of the Turkish volunteers left, I put some strict rules in front of me to get to know people very easily and understand them. In this article I am going to share some tips, which could be useful when you live with other volunteers also.
1- Active listening - The main rule to know the person. It does not matter what volunteers say or if he/she is right or not. Just listen. Let him/her finish talking. This will help you to find out what kind of person he/she is. Try to be attentive to what that person wants. Then express your opinion.
2- Approach - In a flat, some argues starts due to not having the appropriate approach of expressing your opinion. When someone complaints about something that person should keep a balance of expressing an opinion. That means, instead of saying “Is it yours? Why do not you clean your staff?“ you can say “Is it yours? Please could you clean that?” I need to use. This type of conversation always keeps the good atmosphere in a flat and made a person to clean his staff through kind behave.
3- Share - One of the important rules to make friendship, brotherhood in a flat. If someone asks you to use a piece of your bread or one cup of milk etc. it could be everything. Do not be stingy. Share it. It will also help to know the person from the 1st time. By sharing you let flatmates know you and earn time to know them also.
4- Patience - In my opinion another main rule of creating a friendship with flatmates. We have not been insured by any situation. Inside a flat between volunteers or between you and other volunteers could be a misunderstanding. It also could affect others and damaged a good atmosphere. Meanwhile, you have to be patient. Do not be pushy to anyone. Deal everything through peace. Because you will see that person’s face every time since morning till night. So, if a small detail makes you angry, you will not able to live and if you give up or cancel the project that giving up will affect your private life also. Why? Because, every problem in a flat is not a big global problem, as an experienced person I could mention that I solved many misunderstanding and learned some useful things. The more patient you are, the better atmosphere you could get. 5- Relationship - Try not to have a relationship with any flatmates. In some point, if partners argue, it will affect the flat’s environment also. Even if partners are nice between each other, at some point, it will affect the relationship with other volunteers. I got this experience while being Mid Term training. I made friends and they talked about their situation in the house.
6- Leadership - If there is a misunderstanding every time if you can not focus on your tasks, if there are arguments, the negative atmosphere in a flat, try to take leadership. Organize everything, solve the problem, make peace. It will help you and others to be in a nice atmosphere in the flat.
7- Clean after yourself - One the important rule in the house. It does not depend on your gender, if you shaved in a bathroom, ate in a kitchen clean your plates, wash your bowls after eating. So, whatever you do, clean after yourself. It also improves respect to you in a flat.
I just mentioned some rules that are considered important, experienced during volunteering life. You will also discover some rules when you will be a volunteer.